Miss Bennett in the Bay

As I journey towards being a fully credentialed teacher in California, I am required to be enrolled in a credentialing program and pass certain tests to prove that I can, indeed, teach. My credentialing program is called Alliant “University“. Basically, the entirety of the Bay Area corps enrolls with this program because they will give us our credential in one year instead of two. Thus far, I have not been impressed with the program. They tend to waste my time by telling me over and over that I need to be preparing my students for the CST by practicing the CST released questions with them. Yes, thanks for that. Please, tell me something I don’t already know.

Anyway, today’s Saturday session of classes started at 9 am in San Francisco. The purpose of this session was to prepare us for the RICA, a very important exam that none of us have ever heard of. One would think that spending 5 hours in a random building across from Pier 39 for such a purpose wouldn’t actually be that bad. One would think that they would spend those hours telling me what will be on this test and showing me exactly how to prepare for it. Instead, they decided that it would be more fun to force me to get up early on a Saturday and drive all the way to the city just so they could waste my time.

The woman in charge of our session about reading comprehension, spelling, and phonemic awareness seemed pretty put together in the beginning. We started the session by talking with each other about how we teach these things. Oh, good, I naively thought to myself. This will actually be useful. To be fair, that part of the day actually was useful because I got to exchange ideas with my fellow teachers. Then, however, the woman decided that none of us were actually literate, because she proceeded to read to us from the test prep book for an hour. I am not exaggerating. Then, she expected us to retain all of that information because she gave us some sample questions and asked us to complete them. It was a whole big packet of questions. She gave the packet out at 12:57. The day was supposed to end at 1. Jess (who, like me, was about to explode from the ridiculousness) raised her hand and said, “So, what, you’re giving us like 5 minutes for this?” And the woman actually says, “No. You take the time you need to take. It’s your time, not mine, and we started late, so you will sit there and answer those questions.” I thought that Jess was going to kill her. I, on the other hand, was contemplating the possible uses for my water bottle as a self-harming weapon. I figured if I was bleeding I’d have a decent reason to leave.

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Nothing frustrates me more than when I’m entering in the data for our goal quizzes and the class average goes down to 79% at the last possible moment. We shoot for 80% mastery to meet our Big Goal, and tonight I graded a quiz on measurement. All but 5 of the kids got 80 or above. The spreadsheet keeps a running tally of the class average as you’re entering the grades, so I was up at 85% until I got to the last couple of kids. Then, it dipped to 79%. If one kid had even gotten one more question right, the average would have been at 80. Ugh.

For me, the most difficult part of teaching is figuring out what to do when all but a handful of the students have completely mastered the material, and that handful has absolutely no idea what is going on. I can’t reteach whole class because 16 of the kids will be bored out of their minds. It is very difficult to reteach those kids as a group or individuals because we’re already stretched for time as it is. I suppose I should start pulling them during recess, but I can’t imagine those kids going an entire day without a break. Suggestions?

Ok, I’ll admit it. I was wrong about the 100 Book Challenge. Well, perhaps wrong is not the right word. Misinformed is more accurate. It turns out that I was pulled out of my classroom on Wednesday for something actually worthwhile (shocker!) I think that the 100 Book Challenge will turn out to be a really awesome addition to the curriculum for my students. The basis of it is that they are challenged to read 100 “steps” (15 minutes a piece) or more. They are given books that are actually on their level (which is way more than I have currently). For every 100 steps they read, they are given a medal (which I know my kids are just going to flip over). The logical research shows that the more kids read, the more they learn. I think that’s pretty intuitive to any teacher, but the 100 Book Challenge makes it easy for you to get them to do that.

To top it off, I actually got a decent sub who (get this!) followed my lesson plan. I met the guy before school started and he’s subbing as a way to decide if he wants to be a full time teacher. He was asking me all these questions about my credential and whatnot. I saw him with my kids and he seems like he can handle it. I’ll definitely call him next time I have to be out for something.

The final bit of news for the week brings me into my classroom. We are working on measurement in math, and on Friday during math time I had a massive headache. Of course, the kids finished their measurement worksheets in about five seconds, almost before I had even finished passing them out. I was feeling far too crappy to come up with something else on the spot (I am prone to migraines and that would have just pushed me over.) So, I told them to work with a partner and measure things around the room. I was helping V measure the height of the board when I felt something against the back of my leg. I look down to see J measuring me. They were quite excited about “measuring Ms. Bennett,” so I let them go for it. They measured my feet, legs, ears, hair, and head. Then they started measuring each other. Too bad they won’t be asked to do that on the CST, because my second graders would ace that.

After 6 days back in the classroom after break, I simply can’t decide if I’m feeling renewed or burnt. I’m certainly working much harder and more purposefully than I was before break. I have solid plans, and a solid vision. I feel like a teacher now (as opposed to feeling like a “teacher.”) These things give me a fresh perspective, and at times I genuinely enjoy and look forward to going to work in the morning (which is a huge improvement).

But then, on the other hand, I had about only 8 hours to myself this weekend. I count time when I am sleeping as not being time to myself because I’m usually having some crazy dream about work. Scott and I went to the Egyptian museum in San Jose and then went out for dinner on Saturday. On Sunday we went out for breakfast and we rented a movie to watch in the evening. The whole rest of the time I was working. When you consider that 8 hours is all I get to myself all week, it’s quite easy to see why I am questioning whether I feel renewed or burnt.

Jess and I have planned more than we have ever planned before: we made a long term plan to prepare our students for the CST, we planned a math intervention, we planned really engaging lessons for ELA and math, and we have to restart reading intervention. I know our planning is purposeful and will actually help our students. The flip side of purposeful planning is working relentlessly. Which really means that my to-do list is impossibly long and I am so overwhelmed that I don’t know where to start. It means that after a long weekend of work, I have to extend my workday in the morning (by arriving at school at 7 am) and work until I go to bed at 10 pm.

In spite of all that, I don’t feel burnout in the way I felt it before break. The feeling then was a feeling of general angst about everything, and working in a totally ineffective way. Now I’m just tired, but I know what I’m doing will actually help, so I can at least motivate myself to continue doing it. It is rather overwhelming, though.

In the midst of all of this, I’m supposed to schedule another observation and meeting with my Program Director. She emailed me a date and time, and I somehow got it into my head that it was supposed to be next week. Turns out it’s actually supposed to be tomorrow, and I haven’t turned in the stuff I’m supposed to. My PD called, concerned. I explained to her about my ridiculous to-do list, not to mention all the crazy time constraints on us this week. Instead of telling me to rearrange my plans (like some of my other advisors might do) she rescheduled for a time that was convenient for me. She’s even willing to discuss with me on a weekend if it will make my stress level go down. I might not get a lot of support from my district, I might not get a lot of support from my administration, but I sure do get a lot of support from TFA. And it makes all the difference in the world.

I returned to my classroom this week after the craziest travel ordeal of my life. I won’t go into the messy details, but basically I am never flying on United again. Unless I need a good dose of surliness and headache. Then I’ll be sure to look them up.

On Monday, M walked into my classroom late (as usual) and handed me a small Christmas-y gift bag. I didn’t open it until after I got home that night. The contents? A pair of pretty (fake) gold earrings and a stick of deodorant. M does not speak enough English to explain his gift to me, and I am too embarrassed for both of us to ask another student to translate. This gift beats the previous winner for strangest gift: the silk blouse.

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It is weird to think how much can change in a year. A year ago, Denver was still buried under 2 feet of snow and I was still thinking that I would be going to graduate school in psychology. Now, I live in San Jose, CA and I teach a bunch of second graders how to read and do math. Talk about an alternate universe.

Staying true to myself, I’m not going to go and get all sentimental on my blog. I am going to say that I can’t believe how fast this year has gone. Since it started, I have pretty much been going nonstop. From finishing my last semester of college and graduating to rushing out to the Bay Area to take the CSET to packing up my life to institute to teaching in San Jose, 2007 was one big blur. I am hoping that 2008 will offer some more Ms. Bennett time. Maybe in the summer. It’s certainly not going to be any time before that since all I’m going to be doing is working relentlessly to get my students to proficiency.

Speaking of which, I am really looking forward to seeing my students again. I was showing my grandparents a picture of them and I forgot how cute they were. It’s nice to be able to have that perspective.

And lastly, teachfor.us news reports that Miss Bennett in the Bay is the most-read blog on the teachfor.us site. How very exciting. For those of you out there in cyberspace, I thank you, and I hope that my posts have been at least mildly entertaining. (And yes, I forgave them for referring to me as “Miss Mennett.”)